Let’s get real about Self-care
For some reason, when we hear the term self-care a lot of us think "bubble bath". While on the one hand, don't knock it til ya try it, it's obviously about more than that and it’s not always so luxurious. Self-care is really about building strength and resilience to navigate whatever life throws our way. It goes deeper than simply "treating yourself." There’s a clear difference between regularly taking care of our overall well-being and indulging in momentary pleasures, often at the peak of stress in a cycle of stress. Recognizing that distinction is key to becoming more balanced, grounded, and ultimately successful.
a Focus on Overall Well-Being
Self-care is a deliberate and proactive practice aimed at maintaining and enhancing your physical, mental, and emotional well-being. It involves making choices that prioritize your long-term health and happiness. Here are some key characteristics of self-care:
Regular Practice: Self-care is an ongoing, consistent commitment to taking care of ourselves. It's not just an occasional indulgence or break from routine, but rather a part of our daily or weekly routine.
Health-Oriented: Self-care focuses on maintaining and improving our health. While it can and should involve rest and relaxation, sometimes we have to do things for our health that we don’t want to do. It involves actions like eating nutritious meals, exercising regularly, going to bed earlier, seeking medical care and, yes, starting therapy.
Holistic Approach: Self-care addresses various aspects of our lives, including physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being. It aims to create balance in all these areas, so we have to first ask ourselves (and be honest about) where there is imbalance. What is getting too much of our energy or too little?
Sustainable: Self-care practices should be sustainable in the long run. That’s the difference between “treating ourselves” and a regular practice. It’s important to reward ourselves for hard work and accomplishments, indulge in a guilty pleasure every now and again, but moderation is key. What we do should contribute to our overall well-being and be achievable on a daily or weekly basis.
self-care to stay in the game
Make no mistake, “acts of self-care” aren’t always enjoyable. Sometimes it’s a painful foam roll or ice bath after an intense training day. You don’t always want to do it but it’s necessary for your performance, your healing and rehabilitation, and your dedication to self-growth. Self-care is about the long game. It's how you make sure you're at your best physically, mentally, and emotionally, even when life gets tough. This isn’t just about lighting a candle and meditating (although that’s great if it works for you). It's about doing the things that keep you sharp and ready for whatever comes next—whether that’s hitting the gym to stay in shape, eating right and getting enough sleep so you’ve got the energy to crush it at work, or setting boundaries so you’re not burning out.
Here’s the thing: self-care is regular maintenance. Like keeping your car in top shape. You don’t wait until it breaks down to change the oil, Same goes for your health and well-being. You’ve got to make it a habit—something you do consistently, and even, maybe especially, when you don’t feel like it. Over time, these small, regular actions add up and make you stronger. This is resilience in action. You’re not just surviving the daily grind; you’re thriving.
How to Balance Both Like a Pro
Think of it like training or preparing for an event. Athletes, especially, may be so hungry for their sport, that they find it difficult to deliberately schedule rest and rehab days. Their bodies and minds need both. They need that ice bath, that foam roller, things that may be unpleasant but are necessary to sustain themselves. Big presentation at work? Imagine putting so much time and effort in that you forgo time for yourself. Now the execs are in town, ready to hear your pitch, but you’ve gotten so little rest the last few days that you’re not at your best. You’re fumbling because you’ve maxed out your reserves. You could have used a day or two away from the project to let it sink in, but we don’t think of self-care as an integral part of our overall performance, so why would we make time for it? Here’s how we can reframe self-care to see it as the essential tool that it is:
1. View Self-Care as System for Success: Make it a priority. Build habits that boost your health, energy, and resilience. That might be sticking to a workout routine, staying on top of your mental health by checking in with a therapist, or simply scheduling downtime so you can recharge.
2. Treat Yourself, But Make It Meaningful: It’s important to recognize our own growth. When you hit milestones, celebrate! Buy that thing, take that trip—just make sure it’s tied to your hard work, not an escape route from stress you haven’t dealt with yet.
3. Mindful Indulgence: Don’t go overboard. Enjoy the things you love, but don’t let them derail your progress. A night out with the guys is great, but it shouldn't throw off your routine for the rest of the week.
4. Check In With Yourself: Every once in a while, take stock. What’s working? What’s not? Maybe you’ve been treating yourself a bit too much, or maybe you’ve been so focused on outside obligations that you’ve forgotten to fill your own cup. Be real with yourself and adjust as you go.
the takeaway
Regular self-care is not about bubble baths, it’s a whole system of tools and practices for sustainable and successful outcomes.
Start seeing self-care as a strength- and resilience-building endeavor. When you approach it that way, you’ll not only handle stress better and come out stronger on the other side, you’ll also probably enjoy yourself a whole hell of a lot more. Therapy can be a great place to learn what true self-care really is and to design a regular practice that fits your lifestyle and goals.
